When I buy a new book, I always read the last page first, that way in case I die before I finish, I know how it ends. That, my friend, is a dark side.
When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.
Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.
If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters.
The major concrete achievement of the women's movement of the 1970's was the Dutch treat.
Women are being considered as candidates for Vice President of the United States because it is the worst job in America. It's amazing that men will take it. A job with real power is First Lady. I'd be willing to run for that. As far as the men who are running for President are concerned, they aren't even people I would date.
I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
I have made a lot of mistakes falling in love, and regretted most of them, but never the potatoes that went with them.