I am unable to believe in a God susceptible to prayer. I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits, and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds.
Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.
If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.
Health consists of having the same diseases as one's neighbors.
Treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
To know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody.
The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we have of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.
When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, "Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?"
My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it.
Flowers are words even a baby can understand.