In an age when the fashion is to be in love with yourself, confessing to be in love with somebody else is an admission of unfaithfulness to one's beloved.
New York is the only city in the world where you can get deliberately run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian.
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.
People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.
The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.
Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down.
People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure.
Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three major categories - those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.
Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not really progress at all, but just terrible things.
The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn't require any.