Canada is a country so square that even the female impersonators are women.
Canada is the essence of not being. Not English, not American, it is the mathematic of not being. And a subtle flavour - we're more like celery as a flavour.
Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and cold fronts. Our main imports are baseball players and acid rain.
I used to go missing a lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World.
Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place.