Philosophy, n. A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum -- I think I think, therefore, I think I am.
The covers of this book are too far apart.
Experience, n. The wisdom that enables us to recognize as an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced.
Critic, n. A person who boasts himself hard to please because nobody tries to please him.
Christian, n. One who follows the teachings of Christ insofar as they are not inconsistent with a life of sin.
Opera, n. A play representing life in another world whose inhabitants have no speech but song, no motions but gestures, and no postures but attitudes.
Cynic, n. A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
Optimist, n. A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
Dentist, n.: A Prestidigitator who, putting metal in one's mouth, pulls coins out of one's pockets.