You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.
Comedy is acting out optimism.
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately, it kills all of its students.
Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.
Ah yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
Cocaine is God's way of saying that you're making too much money.